Getting Married

#KAYXFEN: The Solemnization Ceremony

February 13, 2017

Read part 1 here

Like I mentioned in the previous post, I didn’t have time to mentally prepare myself before walking in the hall. I was from scoffing down a curry puff chill to nervous beyond words. It was so surreal, it felt like time was moving by so fast. Seeing the hall full of familiar faces was surreal as I had only seen it empty the night before. My heart was thumping so hard! I was so nervous, I was literally clinging to my mother for support. Walking in we had all eyes, phones and smiles on us! It was again, so surreal. I couldn’t believe that months of planning. It was finally happening!

Walking down the hall, I took my seat on the dais with my mother. I was told to not look around the hall “Don’t let your eyes wander, keep your eyes down” well, that didn’t happen! I couldn’t help but look around. I was so happy to see my close family and friends in the hall, witnessing this special day with us. During the wait for the Tok Kadi (spokesperson) to start the ceremony, I couldn’t help but notice how confident Don looked. Not a single trace of nervousness. He was smiling and looked so happy.

Looking at him so happy, it hit me – Wow, we are sealing the deal for real now. We are finally beating the distance. We are finally able to be together in one place. We fought the distance hard! and tears couldn’t stop flowing. My mother didn’t notice I was tearing up. I had to look up to make sure my tears didn’t ruin my makeup. I had to tap her for tissues to wipe my tears away.

While I was wiping my tears, the ceremony started… again, I didn’t have time to mentally prepare myself for it. Before I knew it, Don and my father recited the lafaz. It took me a moment to come to terms that we’re legally married. Husband and Wife! After the lafaz, Don read the terms of marriage (taklik), signed his part of the document, my father brought over the paper for me to sign my part and after that, Don went to salam (give respect) his parents then he came over to me to me so we can exchange rings and pass me my dowry.

After that, we were blessed by our family members (i didn’t put a photo up to respect their privacy) where they threw Bunga rampai and sprinkled rose water on our palms. Once that was over, we went down the dais to cut our pulut kunning cake (yellow glutinous rice cake). After that, our family and friends went to their tables for lunch and we went around to say hi to everyone.



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After lunch, Don and I had to do our wedding shoot. It had to be one of the most cringe-worthy photos taking moments. I warned my photographers that I didn’t want any cringe-y photos and just take “normal” wedding photos. Thank god, they obeyed my wishes! Both Don and I are still in disbelief that we’ve finally closed the distance. We are also in disbelief that it didn’t take us as long as we thought it would. I guess we couldn’t wait and worked out a way to be together. By the end of the day, we were both so tired and glad that we got through the ceremony without a scratch.

Below is our fast edit for our ceremony, you’ll get to see more of what happened during the ceremony in the video.

khairasignatureRead more on our Getting Married series here.

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  • Gary See

    Hi, I will start the registration process(paper work) soon to get married with my wife(Singaporean). May I know how you can have your solemnization ceremony outside as I heard from officer that we need to register at JPN office. Is it true? Thanks for help